A Guide to Languages

Spanish and Italian: So THESE words are feminine and THESE words are masculine, and you ALWAYS put an adjective AFTER the noun.

French :haha i don't fuckin know man just do whatever

German: LET'S ADD A NEUTRAL NOUN HAHA

English: *shooting up in the bathroom*

Gaelic :the pronunciation changes depending on the gender and what letter the word starts and ends with and hahah i don't even know good fucking luck

Polish: here have all of these consonants have fun

Japanese: subject article noun article verb. too bad there's three fucking alphabets lmao hope your first language isn't western

Welsh: sneeze, and chances are you've got it right. idfk

Chinese: here's a picture. draw it. it means something. it can be pronounced four different ways. these twenty other pictures are pronounced the same but have very different meanings. godspeed.

Arabic: so here's this one word. it actually translates to three words. also pronouns don't really exist. the gender is all in the verb. have fun!

Latin :here memorize 500 charts and then you still don't know what the fuck is happening

Sign Language:If you move this sign by a tenth of an inch, you'll be signing "penis"

Russian: idk man its pronounced like its spelled but good fucking luck spelling it

Greek: so basically we're going to add 15 syllables to every word you know and assign it one of 3 genders at random. Also good luck figuring out where to put the accents you piece of shit

Gollum Version of "I Knew You Were Trouble" by Taylor Swift

Once upon time a few mistakes ago, we were in our cave, you got us alone
You found us, you found us, you found us
We thought that you were food, you didn’t like that
So we played a game, but when we turned our back
You tricked us, you tricked us, you tricked us
Now it’s long gone, we were stupid to trust
And we realize the blame is on us
Cause we knew you had the precious when you walked in so shame on us now
Our cries echo to the Misty Mountains
Since you came around cause, we knew you had the precious when you walked in
So shame on us, now our cries echo to the Misty Mountains
Now we’re lying on the cold hard cave
Oh, oh, precious, precious, precious
Oh, oh, precious, precious, precious
Black Riders chased us down ,they never saw us cry
Okay maybe we cried, but we had to stay alive
For the precious, the precious, the precious
We heard you moved on from Birdses in the trees
They say you’re with the Hobbits, just due east
So we eats those birds, we eats those birds, we eats those birds
It was long gone, we were stupid to trust, and we realize the joke is on us
Cause we knew you had the precious when you walked in so shame on us now
Our cries echo to the Misty Mountains
Since you came around cause, we knew you were trouble when you walked in
So shame on us, now our cries echo to the Misty Mountains
Now we’re lying on the cold hard cave
Oh, oh, precious, precious, precious
Oh, oh, precious, precious, precious
Then the saddest fear comes creeping in
That you never loved us or him or anyone or anything
Yeah
Cause we knew you had the precious when you walked in so shame on us now
our cries echo to the Misty Mountains
Since you came around cause, we knew you were trouble when you walked in
So shame on us, now our cries echo to the Misty Mountains
Now we’re lying on the cold hard cave
Oh, oh, precious, precious, precious
Oh, oh, precious, precious, precious
Cause we knew you had the precious when you walked in so shame on us now
precious, precious, precious

Narcissistic Bruno Mars "Just The Way I Am"

Oh, my eyes, my eyes make the stars look like they're not shinin'
My hair, my hair falls perfectly without my tryin'
I’m so beautiful
And I tell me everyday
Yeah, I know, I know when I compliment me, I will believe me
And it's so, it's so sad to think that everybody don't see what I see
But every time I ask myself do I look okay?
I say
When I see my face
There's not a thing that I would change
'Cause I’m amazing
Just the way I am
And when I smile
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
'Cause boy, I’m amazing
Just the way I am
My lips, my lips, you could kiss them all day if I’d let you
My laugh my laugh, some hate it but I think it's so sexy
I’m so beautiful
And I tell myself everyday
Oh, I know, I know, I know I’d never ask me to change
If perfect's what I’m searching for, then I’ll just stay the same
So don't even bother saying I look okay
I know I'll say
When I see my face
There's not a thing that I would change
'Cause I’m amazing
Just the way I am
And when I smile
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
'Cause boy, I’m amazing
Just the way I am
The way I am
The way I am
Boy, I’m amazing
Just the way I am
When I see my face
There's not a thing that I would change
'Cause I’m amazing
Just the way I am
And when I smile
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
'Cause boy, I’m amazing
Just the way I am, yeah