Trans Versus Lesbian

Hey guys so this is just my take on how to tell the difference between being a lesbian and identifying as trans. People ask me a lot, how did I know, or they tell me their story about how they like girls and how they like to dress in "male" clothes, but they don't quite feel like a man. So they will ask if I think transition is right for them. And every time I get that question I sit there and think how the hell should I know if transition is right for you?

First of, I don't know that transition is right for anybody. I can't determine that, that isn't something I can determine now or ever. I suggest that you go to therapy to help get that outside perspective, and to have someone you can open up to without the fear of friends or family finding out anything.


But I think the main focus here is that you can be a girl and wear male clothes. You can wear boxers and want to look muscular and like girls and all that, without being trans. I mean I understand that when you play with that gender line, you may wonder what you are. You might think well maybe I'm a lesbian or maybe I am trans. I get that you kind of battle that in between, but I don't think that just because you're a female who likes females and dresses like a guy that you are absolutely transgender. I feel like a lot of people are crossing that line super quick I mean they see trans guys out there and they think immediately oh well I fit that criteria so I must be trans too. I don't know that it takes years to recognize that you're the opposite gender on the inside, but I do think it takes a fair amount of time to establish that it is the way you want to live.

So how do I know that you're trans? Well I don't. But if you can get up everyday knowing that you're a lesbian and that you dress like a guy, and you're okay with that, then maybe transitions not right for you. But if you're getting up and are upset about how your clothes fit or how you look, when you want to fit in with the opposite gender, and not because of your sexual orientation but because of how you actually feel inside.

Honestly you don't have to make a choice right away, just because testosterone and estrogen are available to you, you shouldn't just say "oh alright I'll get that" I do not suggest starting T until you wake up every single day and feel like a man. And you don't flip flop between genders. Especially because if you change your mind, you're are screwed if you have already started T.

Its really okay to ride the gender line, it truly is.